Criticism is hard to do well. So hard, in fact that most of us shouldn’t attempt it. When you do find yourself inclined to offer criticism – no matter how oblique, use the split second delay time that should exist between your thoughts and your words to do a quick hypocrisy check. Are you guilty of the same error? Or worse? (And sorry to be the one to tell you, but all those “it’s different” excuses you have are horse hockey. It’s almost never different. We just like to tell ourselves it is.)
If your BS detector goes off, that’s a good thing. Because if you are struggling just like someone else, then you should be commiserating with them, not criticizing. And commiserating is more fun to do; it’s a bonding experience and takes some sting out of our failures. Sometimes its even just the thing to muster the courage to make changes you‘ve been thinking you need to make!
Which is great! Because perhaps once you’ve actually mastered the path you are telling someone else they should be taking, your words could be useful. But until then, resist the urge to criticize people and just walk along side them.